plight of the kitchen poet


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Maybe because my diet is mainly cheese and more cheese food does not play very highly into my poetry. I know some poets who write whole books about food; odes to soups and ham and eggs and whatnot. This is a photo of my kitchen. What's wrong with it?

No cheese in sight! Where's the munster? There should be a poem about munster somewhere …

Now, I thought the world lacked poems about cheese and was going to write something until I found this link, a whole webpage devoted to cheese poetry! I will let you judge for yourself the quality of the poems. I will leave you with a sample from Anthony Karalian and his poem "Old School Cheese." As Dave Berry would say, I swear, I am not making this up:

Yo, Yo, cheese is as fine as my fro.
I'll always want to eat it, even when I grow.
Cheese is a desire, I've gotta have some.
People that are really mean, must really lack some.
Cheese is Old School fun,
You can even stick it in a burger bun.
If you wanna try some, come to my pad, you're welcome.
Oh please, oh please, won't you just try some?
Polly want a cracker? NO! Polly wants some cheese.
Is that Green Eggs and ham? WRONG. That's a bunch of cottage cheese.
You must remember my motto.
Cheese is a power that you can't control, it will take you over, and make you an addict.
AHH, The power of cheese!

One Response to “plight of the kitchen poet”

  1. Eli Says:

    The power of cheese indeed–the power that makes me throw up. RESIST. RESIST. Cheese and I are mortal enemies.

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